Not just jug handles and Jon Bon...

I have heard the jokes…
Q: Why are New Yorkers so depressed?
A: Because the light at the end of the tunnel is New Jersey.

I have read the remarks…
“New Jersey is like a beer barrel, tapped at both ends, with all the live beer running into Philadelphia and New York.” –American everyman Ben Franklin

I have even withstood the blasphemy from statemates…
“New Jersey is a great place to be born in, but it’s best to get out of here before you die,” a balding Garden State bartender once advised me, as if we lived in a hospital that was about to burn down.

Whether in Manhattan for a night out, in Virginia during college or in Europe during a semester abroad, it’s hard to ignore how everyone seems quick with a zinger about exit-oriented New Jersey. 135 off of the Parkway, if you must know, wise guy.

At first I laughed along. Then I started to defend our women and fine coastline, like a good tourist bureau chief husbanded to his state. Now I smile, nod and ignore. New Jersey is much more than jug handles, Jon Bon and a balding mobster named Tony, and it’s about time someone challenged the Garden State haters with compelling truths, not gelled-hair fits of rage. Prepare to be educated, BFrank.

MISCONCEPTION: New Jersey breeds unmotivated bums.
TRUTH: Inventor Thomas Edison, underground railroad leader Harriet Tubman, astronaut Buzz Aldrin, writer Toni Morrison, actor Jack Nicholson, coach Vince Lombardi, superstar Shaquille O’Neal, legend Yogi Berra, crooner Frank Sinatra and rock star Bruce Springsteen were all born in New Jersey. I dare you to find a more dynamic cast.

MISCONCEPTION: Successful people flee New Jersey as soon as they can.
TRUTH: More millionaires live in The Garden State than in any other state in the nation, according to a 2008 story by the Associated Press. Call it Hollywood East.

MISCONCEPTION: New Jersey is home to mostly bitter, callous cynics.
TRUTH: According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, New Jersey residents have the lowest rate of depression in the United States. It makes you want to reconsider that vacation to Honolulu, doesn’t it?

MISCONCEPTION: New Jersey sports fans mooch off of the NYC sports scene.
TRUTH: The first recorded baseball game was played in Hoboken, N.J., and the first college football game was played in New Brunswick, N.J. Also, the New York Giants and New York Jets hike their footballs in East Rutherford, N.J. Who is mooching off of whom here?

You might think that I’ve developed a state inferiority complex and that I’m harping on this topic to self-medicate. Untrue. When you see someone at the JFK Airport in New York with a “Friends don’t let friends live in New Jersey” T-shirt, you know that it’s time to play defense. For few good reasons, The Garden State has become the butt of state jokes, the can’t-miss punch line for bombing comedians and mediocre Founding Fathers. It’s about time people knew the truth.